Ah... that old familiar feeling. Just like being kicked in the gut. Simultaneously having the wind knocked out of you and the urge to vomit. So many times I've felt it, but the shock never goes away. I never anticipate the blow.
Oh, how I'm tired of it! Over and over again I put myself in the same vulnerable position. Maybe one day I will learn, eventually trust no one, let no one get close enough.
Probably not, though. I hope too much for the day my vulnerability is answered with enthusiasm. My track record, however, leaves me little room to hope for such an outcome. Too many times, too much let down, too much to lose the next time.
But, I must trust this is right, and plan accordingly.
SDG
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